Tulpa.info - tulpa-questions-2

too bad i cant do visualization meditation, like imagine a beach etc etc

6:07 PM

but i wouldnt be surprised if i could in some time

6:07 PM

i think i've been as close to having aphantasia as i could for my whole life, i've been just sensing a general feeling of spaces and shapes

Yeah part of tulpamancy techniques involves improving your visualization so maybe you can have help with that

but i've started seeing actual feint white blobs with my eyes closed

6:08 PM

before tulpamancy

6:09 PM

what she has showed me has been white feint and blobby too, but much more defined what i can see by myself

6:09 PM

and i dont have control over them either, but she seems to somewhat

Oh that's neat

it is

Leiko

Oh yeah... i def feel like he's a part of me He reminds me of how i acted when i was 3 and under I was... happy I don't want full integration yet but we can communicate fairly well so i don't think they'll see too much of a need for improvement in that regard But like Often when i switch back from eishi i get all weird feeling and once i forgot who i was

@Kei Wendt - jump it sounds to me like you might have met your inner child which can feel quite distinct There is whole model of Inner Family System Therapy (it introduced terms of inner critic and inner child) which is about seeing parts of yourself as separate than you and have conversations with them and it seems like that’s what you did by accident. I think a lot of people misdiagnosing themselves with osdd or did are basically doing that without knowing it might be a possibility. it’s especially possible when you already have experience with tulpamancy

I was thinking about this and so i read about ifs therapy and it seems there are exiles, managers, and firefighters — would eishi / my inner child be an exile that i discovered?

2:33 AM

I really feel as if he was always there and that i just put a name and a bit more of an identity to him through tulpamancy techniques

That's what my host did

Hello I am Jessica

Hello, we can talk in #general-chat

I was thinking about this and so i read about ifs therapy and it seems there are exiles, managers, and firefighters — would eishi / my inner child be an exile that i discovered?

@Kei Wendt - jump one thing i learned through my 3.5 years of therapy is appreciating the capacity of human brain to have a vast amount of different experiences, and to make sense of things happening in itself by putting labels on them. the risk is though that without proper gentle guidance of a professional people get attached to the labels too much. so i think that if what you read about IFST resonates with you, of course it's fine to consider them your inner child or an exile or a firefighter, but remember that when you put a label on it, you are not discovering "what they really are", all you do is putting a framework to understand certain things happening in your brain, and it's all part of the narrative that has a potential to benefit you, but getting sank in this narrative is potentially harmful as it will distract you from the reality of your situation. keep in mind that at its core IFST is an integrative therapy and the process is about keeping all parts together, not giving them different identities that separate them even more from you. all the parts in IFST are still "you", they "look" like you and feel like you, identify with your legal name, with the body (maybe at different age) etc.

1:24 PM

there is of course nothing wrong with having a tulpa that does not work in the way that parts in IFST work and has a resemblance to inner child, but if it's something you would like to explore more please try to keep in mind what i said above, and keep your inner work like that as grounded in reality and as little fantastical as possible

Ohh ok! That's good to know :0 I dunno if I'm an inner child then, since I don't really identify with kei. I sorta do! But i'm also myself.

I like to think of Elise as being at least modeled after my inner child

3:57 PM

but then I was never into sports as a kid, and she's a real fitness nut, so

Tulpas have freewill and can always deviate

We definitely have some more childlike people here, and they're more vulnerable than the others.

5:46 PM

So generally, the four main fronters try and keep them happy and protected, since they're often quite easily hurt or upset.

not the case for us

5:17 AM

and idk if 12 years old even qualifies as a little honestly

glitchthe3rd

and idk if 12 years old even qualifies as a little honestly

ig 12 is still a classified as a kid, preteen technically, not a teenager. I think it would but it depends on the person's age, if I'm like idk 30 years old

(I'm half that) then I probably think 12 year old me is just a lil kid a lil baby compared to the age of 30. but I am 15 so 12 was only 3 years away and I have changed drastically but I still wouldn't classify 12 as a super young age. So it's all in perspective honestly

12 is definitely still kid age. 14-15 on the line. 16-19 solid teenager

20-25 - an experienced teenager 26-30 - a teenager veteran

Need to get expert level

Im getting the strong desire to make a tulpa of another character of mine. It's weird, because it doesn't feel like the desire is mine. It feels like they want to be brought into existance. What could that mean? And is it safe to create another tulpa even if i'm still working on imposition with eishi?

Luminesce: Imposition has nothing to do with tulpa development (edited)

5:29 PM

It's just about whether you and any existing tulpas agree you want another tulpa, and that they're okay with the split attention time that'll cause

Reisen

Luminesce: Imposition has nothing to do with tulpa development (edited)

Oh ok. So i can work on it even after i start working on a new tulpa

Reisen

It's just about whether you and any existing tulpas agree you want another tulpa, and that they're okay with the split attention time that'll cause

We're okay with it It feels like this new person has to exist, too I almost feel like if i let them exist, i'll remember some memories that have been locked away

Tuplas can also help make tulpas as well

Oh yeah forgot about that

6:25 PM

Well Momo exists now They're already responding in full sentences This is faster than my first tulpa was created too

Im getting the strong desire to make a tulpa of another character of mine. It's weird, because it doesn't feel like the desire is mine. It feels like they want to be brought into existance. What could that mean? And is it safe to create another tulpa even if i'm still working on imposition with eishi?

@Kei Wendt - jump a classic let-in

ohh i see

8:15 PM

i mean i was planning on making them eventually anyways but i wasnt expecting them to become a letin

let-in becomes a let-in when you let them in

if you were planning to get a tulpa that was probably already a forcing process

oh like by accidentally passive forcing?

8:18 PM

cuz like i hadnt started formally planning them, i was just thinking "that's the next oc i want to be a tulpa"

as you can see, there is no difference between planning and formal planning (whatever you mean by that) lol

oh i meant like i thought about it but didn't sit down and plan for it to happen

8:40 PM

until today ofc when i planned to let in the let-in

1

i don't think any of sort of planning like writing personality traits and things like that is needed to make a tulpa, what i believe you need is a feel of the person you want them to be be and it sounds to me like that's what you had

yeah

What did your guys’ breakthroughs feel like? Like how/when did you know your tulpa was sentient?

I dont like talking about sentience... I think its a stupid abstract word that means nothing. I would prefer to talk about the feel of idependence.

12:57 AM

You cant measure sentience, and you dont get a feel of if someone is sentient, but you do get a feel about when the tulpa is independent.

Milk

What did your guys’ breakthroughs feel like? Like how/when did you know your tulpa was sentient?

I started believing it more when my first tulpa started doing unexpected things, which was on the third day i think? As for my most recent tulpa they started speaking really quickly too (only let them in today, actually) and they're already doing things that i didn't think they would do

Someone here was doing imposition?

Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)

I dont like talking about sentience... I think its a stupid abstract word that means nothing. I would prefer to talk about the feel of idependence.

That’s fair. I suppose I mean whatever made you realize oh that’s not me

Milk

That’s fair. I suppose I mean whatever made you realize oh that’s not me

Exactly!

Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)

Someone here was doing imposition?

I slightly modified a noise shader to slowly tend to just gray, it could be an interesting imposition exercise

Kei Wendt

I started believing it more when my first tulpa started doing unexpected things, which was on the third day i think? As for my most recent tulpa they started speaking really quickly too (only let them in today, actually) and they're already doing things that i didn't think they would do

Wow! Three days. I’m jealous.

It starts as random noise where its really easy to impose and see patterns and really slowly tends to just grey

Ooo

If anyone is interested ill share it, just tell me how it goes and if it works

Can you post it here?

Yeah

1:08 AM

https://www.shadertoy.com/view/msVXRD Its set for 5 minutes, it will start as full noise, and in 5 minutes it will become full gray

Shadertoy

1:08 AM

you can change it by changing the "seconds" variable (edited)

1:09 AM

if you put 60.*10. it will take 10 minutes

1:09 AM

for example

1:09 AM

click compile after changing it

1:09 AM

or alt+enter

1:09 AM

full-screen it for better effect

Interesting! Thank you I will give it a shot

Dont hesitate to DM me your findings (or ping or whatever you feel more comfortable with)

1:11 AM

If you set a high enough timer you might end up imposing over gray without even realizing it!

It’s definitely very easy to see shifting patterns. I get a lot of concentric rings. Reminds me of those optical illusions where you have to go slightly cross eyed to see the 3d image “pop”

Try to control the patterns

1:16 AM

For example, imagine a ball bouncing arround the screen

1:17 AM

Or a 6 point start rotating or something

1:20 AM

Its really easy for me to see chaotic waves like ripples over which i have no control, and some stuff tends to behave "as i would expect it to" instead of "as i want it to"

Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)

Its really easy for me to see chaotic waves like ripples over which i have no control, and some stuff tends to behave "as i would expect it to" instead of "as i want it to"

Yes it’s the same for me. I was able to start to have some say over the patterns but it does cause a bit of eye strain for me. I’m not very good at holding my eyes open lol and when I blink it makes the patterns jumble up again briefly

You can blink lol!

1:22 AM

Yeah, its okey i also loose the patterns when i blink

1:22 AM

but i prefer blinking over keeping the patterns stable lol

1:23 AM

If you end up doing the full 5 minute excercise until it gets fully gray tell me how the progress was

Yeah my eyes are not a fan of the staring and not blinking thing. Can’t blame them

1:23 AM

Do you recommend it on a computer screen more so than a phone?

I think the optimal is a big screen on full screen

1:24 AM

The shader will adapt to the resolution so no problem with that

Okay. I will probably try it full screen on my computer tomorrow for the full 5 mins.

Like, if you have a 4k monitor or whatever the shader wont be blurry it will still have one random color per pixel (its not like a video) (edited)

Milk

Okay. I will probably try it full screen on my computer tomorrow for the full 5 mins.

I hope it works great, tell me how it goes

Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)

I hope it works great, tell me how it goes

Will do! : )

Desting 😎 (Con Cat)-(おひたし、お浸し)

https://www.shadertoy.com/view/msVXRD Its set for 5 minutes, it will start as full noise, and in 5 minutes it will become full gray

OMG THIS helped me develop minds eye better

10:30 PM

OMG tysm

Wait but did you use it?

so i can make things dissapear now, but i cant create anything

10:42 PM

yeah

10:42 PM

i did

10:42 PM

lol

What do you mean by that?

10:52 PM

make things dissapear but not create anything?